Sunday, August 31, 2008


Last year I was disheartened when the current boxholder of my old CPO BOX at Houghton College began returning my unsolicited correspondence, "Refused." I was rejected. For four years I was the boxholder of that CPO BOX, and it was my daily ritual to skip down the stairs into the basement of the campus center before lunch and stand before the pregnant mail box. Maybe there was a letter from my girlfriend or my folks. Maybe...

On some days I dragged myself back up to the stairs and into the cafeteria, brought low by the tragedy of an empty box, but on other days I scurried upstairs and found an empty couch where I could plop myself down and open a letter from Sarah like a bat ripping into a moth. Furiously, hungrily I tore into it and consumed it. Throughout the day I would regurgitate the sacred letter from my pocket and consume it again and again. There is no hunger for which there is no food.

That CPO BOX was an iconic part of my college experience, and thus when I graduated I resolved to mail things back to the current boxholder whomever he or she may be. I didn't want to be creepy though so I put my return address and a letter explaining myself in the first letter, but he/she would have none of it. I can't conceive of a person who would "refuse" a piece of mail. Who would willfully render the once pregnant mailbox barren? I will not let this stand. You will find no return address on this year's correspondence, and I am recruiting all of you to mail stuff to my former CPO BOX.

Please e-mail me at if you are willing to join project pregnant. I have instructions for you.


steve said...

It may be that the box was not in use last year, and so any mail sent to it was automatically rejected. I similarly cannot conceive of someone at our college who would refuse mail.

Houghtonite said...

I have investigated, and can tell you that a first year student has just been assigned CPO box #1666. So if you start sending mail there, it will be going to a different person from last year. You may have better luck with the new occupant!

barefootkangaroo said...

Excellent work Houghtonite! That is some valuable intelligence! Let the correpsondence begin!!!

boy or girl?